Snow White and seven crazy diamond miners shine on in Grangemouth

A panto is nothing without its dame and this year Brooke Morrison poured every bit of spice and sass she could into her chicken Pot Noodle dress. She had many great moments as 16 times married Dame Rosie, but the highlight was her dancing with youngsters in the audience during her unique rendition of Shania Twain’s Man I Feel Like A Woman.

If anyone wanted to know why the Young Portonians put on a panto every year they just had to look at the pure joy on the children’s faces as they boogied with Rosie.

For many the star of the show was Dame Rosie’s gag cracking jester of a son, Charlie. Looking cheeky and sneaky, Ingrid Hunter had a ball, making bad jokes aplenty and showing off her Cobra Kai crane moves during a musical number.

She also played a part in what has to be one of the funniest moments in the 40 year history of the YPs, when she came out on stage riding on the shoulders of a wee bearded guy in a kilt, who then proceeded to pound on a toy piano in a frenetic rendition of Music Man.

When the wee fella raised his hands up and moved them from side to side in time with a power ballad there were members of the audience who choked on their sports mixtures they were laughing so hard.

Strange there was no mention of the wee fella in the cast list – he was brilliant.

Talking about brilliance – and pure evil – there was no one better on musical numbers than Aimee Malloy, whose amazing singing voice did not sit well with her evil cackle as the Queen. How can someone with such a magnificent set of tonsils treat her poor maid, a very patient and understanding Sophia Donnelly, so badly and then order her kindhearted huntsman, a Robin Hood-esque Olivia Stewart, to kill a beautiful young woman?

The beautiful young woman in question is Snow White, played by the blonde and very tall Lucy Gray. She manages to make her seven pals look suitably wee, really has a great singing voice of her own and made the audience care about her.

There were a few gasps from wee ones when she visited comaville after munching on the Queen's poison apple.

Her love interest was the classically handsome Prince Karl, played with right royal matinee idol style by Josh Fyvie, who was paired with swashbucking Franz, an energetic Hollie McGuire, who looked dashing in her boots – especially when she was dashing away from the attentions of Dame Rosie.

Aided by the faithful – and chronically cute – mute mutt Berger, a taciturn turn from Iris Wilson, the gang go on the hunt for the missing Snow White.

They need not have worried, she was in the good hands of the panto’s very own diamond mining magnificent seven – who all looked like 1980s dungaree wearing children’s telly presenters crossed with DIY SOS team members.

Prof – Beth Rafferty – held things together with her trusty clipboard, while single tooth-toting Silly, Olivia Willson, was daft as a brush and Blusher, Emily Reid, could barely hide her major Snow White crush.

Snoozy – a suitably tired turn from Iona Gillies – and phlegm-thrower Tissue, a, a, a, a, great red nose performance from Emily Fraser, were joined by the happy chappy Merry, played by ever smiling Paige MCGinlay and the grumpy pants Humphy, a surprisingly golden voiced turn from talented singer Darragh Lees, who lyrically laments the fallen Snow White with a beautiful song.

The Young Portonians are really embracing new technology with colourful digital backdrops which allow them to make the Queen’s magical mirror – a skull-tastic performance from Olivia Stewart – appear on stage to deliver her ominous announcements.

Musical director Annie McIntyre and choreographer Lynsey Mitchell teamed up for many great moments – the 9 to 5 number featuring the seven hardhat wearing diamond miners was a real show stopper, as was the forest fairies magical movements to NeverEnding Story and the toe-tapping Monkees number I’m A Believer.

And director Colin Scott must be proud of his talented young cast, who did not put a foot wrong throughout the entire performance.

Even when things went wrong with a faulty cake lid and a pesky train trailer, the youngsters just went with it and gave a couple of knowing looks to the audience which got them laughs the scenes were not meant to enjoy.

During the show someone – possibly Dame Rosie – mentioned the Young Portonians had been entertaining folks for 40 years and now they were looking forward to the next 40.

Well why not? As long as talented youngsters like to get together to perform for audiences who want to laugh, boo and cheer, there’s no reason someone won’t be writing – or broadcasting a live cranial hologram report – about the 80th Young Portonian panto featuring the first android Dame.

The full cast list for Snow White 2022:

Brooke Morrison (Dame Rosie)

Ingrid Hunter (Charlie)

Iris Wilson (Berger)

Lucy Gray (Snow White)

Aimee Malloy (Queen)

Sophia Donnelly (Maid)

Hollie McGuire (Franz)

Josh Fyvie (Prince Karl)

Olivia Stewart (Chief huntsman/Mirror)

Beth Rafferty (Prof)

Olivia Wilson (Silly)

Paige McGinlay (Merry)

Emily Reid (Blusher)

Emily Fraser (Tissue)

Iona Gillies (Snoozy)

Darragh Lees (Humphy)

CHORUS: Alyx Jack Bryce, Mollie Campbell, Martha Forsyth, Molly Gallagher, Riley Goldie, Jessica Goodbrand, Anna Graham, Sophie Grandison, Lachlan Lees, Megan McCroary, Jodie Miller, Kiki Newton, Olivia Quinn